I do believe the disorder is called AskingTooLongOfAQuestionsPhobia. It’s a common disorder suffered by college professors who want to appear smart by adding a bunch of needless fluff to their curriculum in order to make their students feel a bit dumber.

There is no need to give the name of the technique to questions like that since the real purpose is just to see what kind of bullshit you will spit back at them. If you just said it’s brainwashing, then you would not get full points. If you gave a compelling answer with total bullshit like Ashatitootoo Disorder and you explained the disorder and created a wikipedia page to indicate the relevance of your answer, the teacher would have to give you full credit for your answer since he would find valid sources on the internet backing you up.

What the hell, I don’t know, “as often as I look up porn”?

Some quotes that may inspire you;

“The only thing about masturbation to be ashamed of is doing it badly.” Sigmund Freud

“If you’re going to gamble your lives sexually, don’t play a lone hand too much.” -Mark Twain

It really depends on the situation.  I mean it’s one thing to spit out a standard cheesy answer and another to just bullshit on the fly.  To be a true pick up artist you need to be able to make it up.

The first thing that came to my mind upon reading this question was to say that my band performs all over this region and that she has probably seen us play. 

Or perhaps you could say, no I’m afraid not.  As a contract killer, I have developed my focus to exceptional levels and could not have possibly forgotten her face. 

More:  Perhaps you saw me in the old TV show Benson?
This is easy:  I used to own a pet store out on (list an area where there is a pet store), but I sold it a couple years ago.

If you want to do it in the style of actual pick up artists who write books about such things, then you would want to start “negging” her.  Basically smiling while you insult her about about some little thing that people would normally compliment her on. 

I still say, go with a random profession off the top of your head that sounds interesting and rare.  It won’t matter if you say yes or no then, as you will already be an interesting person, worth talking to.

If all else fails you could… dare I say it, try honesty.  Just say “not that I can recall, but I’m Bob [insert very big sincere smile here]“. 

The 1 truth I know about women is that they want you to figure them out. HOWEVER as soon as they KNOW you have figured something out about them they will change it so that you are once again in the dark.

I believe this has developed as part of an evolutionary way to help keep keep the balance of power tilted in their favor.

Belief aside, this and many other sabotaging behaviors that women often exhibit are all part of the fact that they are natural born drama junkies.

No use fighting it. It’s human nature and can only be changed by the women making the conscious decision to ignore her first instinct.

If he was Catholic at one point in his life you could use guilt manipulation to control him.  If this fails break up with his lazy ass and become fuck buddies with your ex. 

If you would prefer some nicer (fru-fru) advice try one of the below resources:

http://www.wikihow.com/Overcome-Laziness
http://www.marathonfamily.com/Default.aspx?tabid=124
http://www.quickiesheets.com/blog/2006/08/22/how-to-stop-being-lazy/

Talk to her… and have interesting stories to say. If she actually listens to your stories intently then just ask her out. If she is looking around or trying to get away then don’t bother and move on to the next.

Funny thing about that is if you got a girlfriend by being a dick, then she probably won’t like you anymore when you stop being one. Unless of course you just start being a little bitch and waiting on her hand and foot.

The best way to stop being a dick to your girlfriend is to figure out why you are a dick and come up with a different way to handle the situation. Once you think you have a handle on it break up with the current girlfriend and wait till you can find another one who won’t put up with it.

Well, you asked these questions on my birthday… So I will go ahead and answer them.

1) is it wrong to have sex with your cousin?
2) should i have sex with my cousin he is extremely hot?
3) is it wrong to be affectionate with your (girl) cousin like cuddling?

I’m sure you were not willing to wait a month for my answer and by this point have gone ahead and had sex with your cousin and you just want me to say it’s ok. Now, I certainly won’t give you any bible logic and say you are going to hell. I mean if that were true ¾ of “southerners” would be burning in hell… Do I think you should breed with them? No, if u want that move to Alabama or Louisiana.

Honest opinion is that it’s your life and you should be able to have sex with whomever you want so long as they are willing participants. Now I wouldn’t go around and advertise the fact that you are fucking your cousin or else you will get an extremely strong social castration that will not ever leave you. I mean you should feel a little dirty about it.. but only dirty enough to be able to still live with yourself without going insane.

Only you are responsible for your actions and only you know what you will be able to live with.

Stop the inbreeding, ban country music.

Dr. Phil was first made famous by the Devil. Oh you don’t believe me? My friend Josh will back me up on this. Oprah is the devil.

Anywho, that devil spawn knows that the best way to spread the message is to use housewives. See housewives / soccer mom’s have the power. They can tell their husbands anything and the husband has to go along with it if he ever wants to have sex with her again.

Basically it’s just a #’s game, and since sensible people wouldn’t listen to Dr. Phill they go with the other people, and hope that those people will be able to corrupt the more sensible people who know that even if their wives are not being logical they have to agree with them.

Question: smartass, i need to ask u something…
during one of my summer holidays i had abit of a tiff(yh im english) with my father, funny thing was that it wasnt my fault. but the thing that shocked me was that as soon as he left to go and get some shopping, i was going upstairs and i had my cellphone in my hand and the next thing i know is that im facing the door with a hole in it (which was’nt there before.) now i freaked out and called my dad, he obviously wanted to know what happened, and i told him the story. we figured it out that it was me that did it but i cant remember putting a hole though a door!!
it may be a phycology thing?(did i spell that right?)
Help me please!!

Answer: Ok dude. you want some psychology (good try) eh. This probably wouldn’t be considered psychology, but rather neurology. If you honestly did get so angry and punch a hole in the door and didn’t know it happened until it was done. Then you probably have a fucked up prefrontal cortex or an overdeveloped amygdala (basically the caveman area of the brain). It overrides the rational brain and suddenly fills your body with dopamine, adrenalin and other uppers fill your body instantly and all your blood shifts away from the skin to fuel your muscles for action. If this area of the brain is over developed you literally can’t think when you are too emotionally stimulated. You simply react.

To be honest, on this one I can’t even be a smartass about it because it is a seriously shitty thing to have. You NEED to be able to find a way to reassociate your strong emotional responses with something else as soon as they begin so that you don’t become a wife beater. Something or someone needs to break your state right before you go into the really strong state. Start by fixing the little things like road rage and trying to just get over it right away.

Basically you have a prefrontal cortex that is supposed to regulate your anger and and other emotions and send signals to the rest of the brain for how to react. Anyways if it learns to control where it sends the signals better by changing your emotional state right when you have it then you will no longer loose control and be overcome by your amygdala.

If this is a one time thing you can just do what I said and fix it yourself. If this has happened more than once where you have blanked out after anger or another emotion you seriously need to seek help. I’m sure most anger management programs aren’t with dick, but I’m sure you could find forums online for people who have had anger issues and have worked them out.