Interesting mix, a dead (yes, dead) pop idle, the dude from Road House, and some guy with a 3 part name that at first I thought was the kid from Home Improvement…

Come on, is there really a contest? I mean Elvis would slap them all silly if he weren’t dead. However since his death the king has gotten even more powerful. That dead man has an army of impersonators and lunatic fans that could destroy all opposition. Perhaps we could send the Elvis’ to war and end this all by tomorrow.

Besides, the king didn’t only do some crazy hip shaking / rocking. He invented a fried-peanut-butter-and-banana sandwich!!!! I mean how can you not respect that!?!?

Silly man, you are just like me and there 4… “The Bitches love you ’cause they know you climb rocks!”

If you need a few more reasons, this video should help explain the rest of the reasons.

T.H. Esky is blue because he was trying to get into the Blue Man Group. He has auditioned so many times his skin has been made permanently blue.

As a general rule I would say when they move out on their own they will grow up a LOT. The next time they mature more is when they have children, because they are now forced to take things from a whole different perspective.

Beyond that I found this list on the internet with “Signs of Maturity”

1. Your house plants are alive, and you can’t smoke any of them.
2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
5. You hear your favorite song on an elevator.
6. You watch the Weather Channel.
7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of hook up and break up.
8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.
9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as “dressed up.”
10. You’re the one calling the police because those damn kids next door won’t turn down the stereo.
11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
12. You don’t know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
13. Your car insurance goes down and your payments go up.
14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonalds leftovers.
15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
16. You no longer take naps from noon to 6 PM.
17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.
18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.
19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.
20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer “pretty good stuff.”
21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
22. “I just can’t drink the way I used to,” replaces, “I’m never going to drink that much again.”
23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
24. You no longer drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
25. You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that this doesn’t apply to you.

I have never even heard of Julian Tass, and neither has google. This means that he is just some poor shlub that you probably go to middle school with. He is annoying, because he has a girly name and feels he needs to retaliate against the world and everyone in it to prove that he is more manly than his namesake.

Your life will be less obnoxious when you just start ignoring the Julian Tass’ of the world and start enjoying life for what it is…. Total BS…. Yep, once you accept it, it becomes easier to tolerate it.

People, don’t you realize that asking a question like this will only serve to open the gates of hell a little further? Again, I ran out of psychic internet connection, so all I can do is make educated guesses based on your question and sentence structure. That being said, I see your anonymous post indicates your TYPE as a BIG girl, with mad “skills”. However, since you have an appearance to keep up and you don’t want to admit it, I will show you how to impress your friends with a picture of your new woman…

A general quality of character.  Somebody who appreciates and finds humor in everything, including others.  Yes, the urban dictionary defines it (mostly from jealous angry people who had fun poked at them after everybody else laughed at a smartass’ joke at their expense) more or less as somebody who uses sarcasm a lot, to annoy people. 

To be quite honest though, I just enjoy the title.  I am smart, and by running this site, I can be an ass.  Also I can say whatever I want because nobody on this site who stays here more than 20 seconds, will be offended.  Call it a way to control my own market.  If I had called it “thesmartguy” instead, then I would have to check what I wrote and keep it all appropriate and shit as to not offend my visitors. 

Fuck that, get a title like smart ass or pussy fucker, or motherfucking rasputin, and be proud to be yourself and say what’s on your mind.

Or perhaps you just wanted to know my qualifications?

Sorry, I ran out of psychic internet connection last month, and I lost the election for new “God” last year, so you will just have to figure out what your brothers names are on your own. I mean I thought family values were really important in Atlanta, GA. I mean if you don’t know your own brothers names, your really need to stop smoking the funny plants in your back yard.

A Tory huh? Like Tory Spelling? I’m not a big fan of hers. She’s nasty looking and just seems kind of diry in a not-so-fun way. So NO I will not tell you a Tory~!

I can’t say deny the fact that some of them are born without first calling myself a fake. I mean have you noticed the title of my blog (Born Smartass)???

Anyways If you have read some of my other posts you would know that I believe absolutely anybody can be made into anything so long as their is strong enough belief.

It’s really quite simple. You are what you focus on most of the time. So if you spend enough time talking to me, there is a fairly high chance that you will end up becoming a smartass yourself.

Oh and if you ever are in need of a smartass response all you need to do is think “what would TheSmartAss say”, and you will surely come up with a great response.