19 Sep 2008 @ 9:53 PM 
 

How To > Dominate The World in 5 Easy Steps (By Google)

 

Step 1) Index all things and make it easy to access, ease people into using this with a search engine that helps people find what they want and a catchy slogan like “Don’t Be Evil”.

Step 2) After building trust with your market convince them to use your open source software. In case they aren’t using it, buy majority of startup software and social networks that they are using. Further direct their focus by getting them to use Chrome and telling everybody it is a web browser, despite being a world domination app.

Step 3) Get your software on all types of media. We will start with showing them a taste of our “browser” and then a couple weeks later we will have every single mobile company using our open source operating system and development platform (Android).

Step 4) Use the “Google Network” that was built by 3rd party companies using our open source software and mobile devices to link all communications together and use all the media devices and world domination software in place on more than 75% of the global economy.

Step 5) Control “truth”, information, media, advertising, and define facts.

Tags Categories: Smartass Posted By: Jamez
Last Edit: 19 Sep 2008 @ 09 52 PM

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  • drag0n
    how to dominate the world in 5 easy steps. too bad the phone company beat us to it!
  • DOMINATE
    you will never controll me >:O not unless i finish these easy steps first >:D
  • animagus
    hmmm... good but not really my style do you have anything more within the catagorey of enslaving a mass populass?
  • Massani
    Ministry of truth, peace and love.

    Dammit Orwell, thanks for giving everyone ideas >.<
  • Clive
    I like it, smartness indeed. Although I admire Google very much. They do a finer job than Microsoft in development. It seems to me like their main interest isn't money, but excellence. Or dominating the world. Coming from them, I'd like both.
  • Wallmart isn't looking to control truth. Just the economy. I suppose you could say that we are currently driven by a very corrupt monetary system and that they already have a dominating grip on it, but that won't get me to stop buying cheap shit at Walmart.

    Much more worried about what will happen when Google defines our reality.
  • ghosty
    What about Walmart's plan? I'm sure they're aiming at something of the sorts as well ಠ_ಠ

    Remember: Always low prices..."always..."
  • cogs
    yes, don't use chrome, use firefox. keep the world free with competition. btw, mo money, mo money...
  • cool. Im currently on step 3.
  • me
    damn
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