A Smartass Education

So I was work and had reason to reference some British words… I thought it would be worth posting them to the site because I enjoyed it.

• ACCOMMODATION in the sense of lodging is singular in English
  and plural in American English
• ADMIRALTY in Britain is the Navy Department in the U.S.
• AGRICULTURAL SHOW is a State or County Fair.
• AIRY-FAIRY means superficial in a disparaging sense and
  is roughly "fanciful"
• ALLOTMENT is a small rented area for growing vegetables
  or flowers away from you home.
• ANORAK is an Eskimo word for a windbreaker or parka.
• ANTI-CLOCKWISE is counter clockwise.
• ARTICULATED LORRY is a trailer truck.
• ASSISTANT – short for shop assistant – would be a salesclerk.
• AU PAIR is a foreign girl who lives as one of the family in return for helping with the children. Enables "foreign" girls to learn English in a family environment.
• AUBERGINE is an EGGPLANT
• BACKBENCHERS is a Member of the House of Commons who is
  not the Minister.
• BAD PATCH means a rough time
• BAGS OF is slang and means piles of – usually referring
  to money.
• BALACLAVA is a woolen helmet named after the site of a
  battle in the Crimean War
• BANGER is slang for a sausage
• BANK HOLIDAY is a LEGAL HOLIDAY in the U.S. Apart
  from Xmas they are all different in Britain
• BARGE POLE is a colloquialism for a ten-foot-pole
• BARRACK is to demonstrate noisily in public e.g. as in
  ‘boo’
• BARRISTER is a TRIAL LAWYER
• BASH is to hit as in ‘bang’
• BATH in Britain becomes BATHTUB in the US
• BATH OLIVER is a dry biscuit eaten with cheese
• BBC the British Broadcasting Corporation
• BEARSKIN is a high, black fur hat worn by Guardsmen
• BELT UP is slang for shut up
• BILL is what one asks the waiter for and in the US becomes
  CHECK
• BIRD is slang for ‘girl’ although in the US DAME would
  be closer
• BIRO is a ball-point pen
• BISCUIT is a CRACKER or a COOKIE
• BIT used where Americans would say "part"
• BITTER is a type of beer
• BLACK TIE is Mess dress or tuxedo
• BLOCK OF FLATS is an apartment building or high-rise tower
  block, or a large house converted to flats
• BLOKE slang for man
• BOBBY is a police officer
• BOG toilet
• BOG-ROLL toilet roll
• BOILER is the furnace
• BOLLARDS are barrels
• BONNET is HOOD when referring to your car
• BOOK as a verb to reserve rooms or theater seats
• BOOT is the TRUNK of your car
• BOOT SALE is a flea market or yard sale
• BOX television
• BOXING DAY is the first week-day after Christmas
• BRACES are SUSPENDERS which as an English word means
  GARTERS
• BRASS PLATE is the equivalent of a SHINGLE
• BUBBLES & SQUEAK is cooked cabbage and potatoes combined
  and fried
• BUILDING SOCIETY is a savings and loan
• BUMBAG is the same as our fanny pack
• BUNGALOW is a single story house detached house
• BUREAU is a writing desk with drawers and a lift-down flap
• CAB-RANK is a taxi-stand
• CALL-BOX is a telephone booth
• CAMIKNICKERS are teddies
• CAMP BED is a COT which in Britain is used for a
  baby’s CRIB
• CANDYFLOSS is cotton candy
• CARAVAN is a trailer
• CAR PARK is a parking lot
• CASHIER is a TELLER
• CALICO is muslin
• CALOR GAS is bottled gas
• CASTOR SUGAR is finer than granulated sugar but not as
  fine as icing-sugar
• CATS EYES are surface road reflectors
• CHAR is slang for tea – the drink
• CHAT UP is slang for handling someone a line especially
  to get to know a girl
• CHEERS thanks; also used as a toast before drinking; also,
  "see you later"
• CHEMIST is a DRUG-STORE
• CHESTERFIELD is a sofa
• CHIPS are FRENCH FRIES
• CLINGFILM is Saran wrap
• CLOAKROOM is a half bath
• COACHES are buses
• COFFEE, WHITE, WITHOUT is coffee, cream, no sugar
• COLLEAGUE is a co-worker
• CONVENIENCE is a REST ROOM
• CONVEYANCING is buying or selling properties
• COOKER is a stove
• CORNFLOUR is cornstarch
• COSTUME is a swimsuit
• COURGETTE is a ZUCCHINI
• COT is a small child’s bed or crib
• COTTAGE traditionally a pretty, quaint house in the country,
  perhaps with a thatched roof (although the name is stretched nowadays
  to encompass almost anything except a flat), may be detached or
  terraced
• COVER NOTE is an Insurance binder
• CRACKING great ("What a cracking bird!")
• CRICKET is a ball game to which Americans have no equal
• CRISPS are potato chips
• CUPBOARD in Britain is CLOSET in the US
• CURRENT ACCOUNT at a bank is a CHECKING ACCOUNT
• C.V. (CURRICULUM VITAE) is a resume
• DAME in Britain refers to a lady who has been knighted
• DAY-RETURN means a ROUND-TRIP ticket usually on
  the railway
• DEMERAEA sugar is the brown sugar usually on the tables
  in pubs, not at all like our baking brown sugar
• DETACHED is a house that stands alone, usually with its
  own garden
• DEVIATION is a detour
• DIARY is our calendar/date or appointment book
• DINNER JACKET is a TUXEDO
• DORMITORY is a multiple bedroom usually found in boarding
  schools and is NOT a barracks
• DRAUGHTS is the game of CHECKERS
• DRESS CIRCLE in the theater is the FIRST BALCONY
• DRESSING TABLE is the equivalent of the American DRESSER
• DRESSING GOWN is a ROBE or bathrobe
• DUAL CARRIAGEWAY is a DIVIDED HIGHWAY
• DUMMY is a pacifier
• DUSTBIN is a GARBAGE CAN
• DUSTMAN is a garbage collector
• DUVET is a eiderdown quilt
• EARLY-CLOSING is an infuriating custom of shops closing
  one afternoon a week
• EARTH as a verb and as an electrical term equals to GROUND a wire
• ELASTOPLAST is BAND-AID
• ELEVEN is a FOOTBALL or CRICKET TEAM (from
  the number of players)
• ENGAGED is what the operator says when the telephone line
  is BUSY
• ERNIE is ‘electronic random number indicator equipment’
  and selects Premium Bond winners
• ESTATE AGENT is a REAL-ESTATE BROKER
• ESTATE CAR is a STATION WAGON
• EX-DIRECTORY is a UNLISTED TELEPHONE NUMBER
• EX-SERVICE MAN is a VETERAN
• FAG is a cigarette
• FANCY DRESS is costumes
• FANCY DRESS PARTY is a costumes party
• FEN is swampland or marsh
• FIRST FLOOR in a building is SECOND-FLOOR in the
  US
• FISH-FINGERS are FISH-STICKS
• FITTED applied to carpets means WALL-TO-WALL
• FIZZY DRINK is pop/soda
• FLAN is an open sponge or pastry case with a fruit or sweet
  filling
• FLANNEL is a face-cloth
• FLAT is an APARTMENT usually one floor
• FLEET STREET is a colloquialism for the PRESS
• FLEX is an electric cord
• FLY-OVER is an over-pass
• FOOTBALL is rugby, not American football
• FORTNIGHT means two weeks or fourteen nights
• FREE HOUSE associated with a Pub means it can sell any
  brand of beer it wishes, it is not linked to any specific brewery
• FRINGE (HAIR) is BANGS
• FULL STOP is the black dot at the end of a sentence called
  in the US a period
• GAMMON is ham
• GARDEN is the property outside a house which in the US is a YARD
• GATEAU is a type of layer cake
• GEARBOX is TRANSMISSION
• GEAR-LEVER is GEARSHIFT
• GEORDIE (pronounced JORDY) is a native of Tyneside and
  also the dialect he speaks
• GEYSER (GEEZER) is a water heater
• GIVE-WAY as a road sign means YIELD
• GLASS is CRYSTAL
• GONGS are slang for military medals
• GOVERNMENT means administration and refers to the people
  currently running the country
• GENERAL PRACTITIONER (GP) is a internist or doctor
• GREASPROOF PAPER is wax paper
• GREEN BELT is a no-building zone around a town or city
• GREENGROCER is a fruit/vegetable store
• GRILL as a verb is to BROIL
• GUILLOTINE is a paper-cutter
• GUMBOOTS are rubber boots
• GUMSHIELD is the same as a mouthgaurd
• GYMKHANA is a local Horse Show
• GYM SHOES are SNEAKERS
• HABERDASHERY is pins, needles, ribbons, thread etc. : and
  is what you ask for in a shop
• HAGGIS a traditional Scottish dish made from a sheep’s
  inside
• HAIRDRESSER is a man or women’s ‘barber shop’ or ‘beauty
  shop’
• HAIRSLIDE is a barrette
• "HALF" when addressed to a bar-tender means a
  half-pint of beer
• HALF-TERM is a mid-term vacation of short duration
• HARD CHEESE is tough luck
• HAT TRICK is a cricket term for taking three wickets by
  three successive balls but it is often to any triple triumph
• HAVE-A-BASH means give it a try
• HAVE NO TIME FOR means to have a low opinion
• HESSIAN is burlap
• HIGH STREET preceded by ‘the’, is the American Main Street
• HIGH TEA served late in the afternoon usually contains
  a cooked item such as eggs or sausages – this is not to be confused
  with ‘tea’ or ‘afternoon tea’ which is merely a cup of tea with
  a cake or very small sandwich
• HIRE PURCHASE is to buy on an installment plan
• HOB is an installed gas, electric range top
• HOLIDAY is a vacation although the university still uses
  vacation for the time after term finishes
• HOMELY is simple or unpretentious and not the ‘ugly’ meant
  in America
• HOOD of a car is known as ‘BONNET’ in England but
  of a cloak or coat is still the same
• HOUSEMAN in a hospital is a doctor or ‘intern’ in America
• HOOVER is to vacuum
• HUNDREDWEIGHT is 112 pounds and 20 Hundredweight are in
  1 ton
• HUNT an Englishman hunts fox or deer but shoots game birds
  or rabbits
• ICE on menus means ice-cream
• ICING SUGAR is similar to our powdered sugar
• IMMERSION TANK is a hot water heater in a house
• INTERVAL is an intermission
• IN TRAIN means coming along as in ‘the work is progressing’
• IRONMONGER is a hardware shop
• JAB is a shot or immunization
• JAM is what Americans would call jelly
• JELLY is what they call Jell-O
• JERSEY is a sweater
• JOINT (of meat) as in Sunday Joint is a piece of roast
  meat
• JUMBLE SALE is a rummage sale
• JUMPER is a sweater (or woolly, or jersey), the American
  ‘jumper’ is a pinafore dress
• JUNCTION is an interchange on motorway
• KEDGEREE is a dish of fish, rice and eggs and often served
  at breakfast
• KETTLE (FOR HOB) is a tea kettle
• KIOSK can be a news-stand or a telephone box
• KIP sleep ("I could do with a kip" or "He’s
  kipping on the sofa.")
• KITCHEN PAPER is paper towels
• KNAVE is a jack in playing cards
• KNICKERS underwear for women
• KNOCK BACK DOUGH is to punch down dough
• KNICKERS are ladies’ underpants
• ‘L’ plates are large red ‘L’s which a person learning to
  drive must put on his car
• LACQUER is hair-spray
• LADDER in a stocking is a ‘run’ in America
• LADYBIRD is a lady bug
• LAGER is beer
• LANDLORD in a pub is the inn-keeper
• LARDER is a pantry
• LAY A TABLE is to set the table
• LAY-BY is a roadside parking area at the side of the road
• LEADER can be a newspaper editorial, the leading counsel
  of a team of lawyers or the first violinist in an orchestra but
  NOT the conductor as is popular in America
• LEMONADE is Sprite, 7UP
• LETTER-BOX is a mail-box
• LEVEL-CROSSING is a grade crossing
• LIFE GUARD is a member of a regiment of the Royal Household
  Cavalry
• LIFT is an elevator
• LINE on a railway means track
• LOO can be an 18th century card game or a lavatory or bathroom
  or whatever you wish to say
• LORRY is a truck
• LOUNGE SUIT is a business and NOT clothes for lounging
  in
• MAC is an abbreviation for macintosh or raincoat
• MAKING CONTACTS is networking
• MAGISTRATE is very close to a justice of the peace
• MAINS is an electric circuit box
• MAISONETTE is an apartment on 2 or more floors
• MAJORITY as a voting term this equals a ‘plurality’ in
  American terms
• MANCUNIAN is someone from Manchester
• MANGETOUT are snow peas
• MARKET many towns have a weekly market day with wares on
  stalls (booths) in the open air – the right to do so goes back
  hundreds of years & the AA book lists them all – so does a
  list available from my office
• MARROW is a very large zucchini
• MARTINI is vermouth – if you want a Dry Martini ash for
  a Gin & French
• MASH is mashed potatoes
• MATCH is what two sides play on a sports field and is equal
  to an American game
• MEAN is tight-fisted or stingy as opposed to the American
  ‘cruel’ or ill-tempered
• MEWS HOUSE is a hose that’s converted from old stables
  or servants’ lodging (usually 17th or 19th century) and is the
  town equivalent of a genuine cottage
• MINCE or MINCED MEAT from the butcher is chopped meat of
  hamburger however MINCEMEAT is chopped apples, raisins etc. Which
  goes into a mince pie
• MOOR is open land often with heather
• MOTORWAY is a Freeway
• MORNING TEA is often served in your hotel room before you
  go down to breakfast
• MUFFIN is a small, spongy cake served toasted and buttered
  – do NOT confuse with the American ‘English Muffin’ which does
  not exist in England.
• MUSLIN is cheesecloth in America but American ‘muslin’
  is calico in England
• NAFF tacky
• NANNY is a child’s nurse
• NAPPY, a corruption of napkin, is a diaper
• NETS are sheer curtains
• NEWSAGENT shop selling newspapers
• NOTECASE is a billfold
• NO ENTRY is wrong way (traffic sign)
• NO OVERTAKING is no passing
• NOTICEBOARD is a bulletin board
• NUMBER PLATE is a license plate
• OFF HIS ROCKER is out to lunch
• OFF LICENSE is a shop which can sell alcohol all day but
  it must be taken away or consumed ‘off’ the premises
• OFF-THE-PEG refers to ‘ready-to-wear’ clothes
• OPHTHALMIC OPTICIAN test eyesight, prescribe glasses, and
  diagnose eye diseases
• OPHTHALMIC MEDICAL PRACTITIONER treats eye diseases, test
  eyesight, prescribes lenses
• OUT OF BOUNDS is equivalent to the American term ‘off-limits’
• OVERLEAF is the reverse side of a page as is P.T.O. (please
  turn over)
• OVERTAKE is a driving term meaning to pass another car
• OXBRIDGE is a portmanteau word for the ancient universities
  of Oxford and Cambridge
• P45 is a pink slip
• PANDA CAR is a small police car
• PANTOMINE has no American equivalent and is an English
  Christmas entertainment based on a fairy-tale with a lot of modern
  singing, dancing and humor – it is not mime
• PANTS are underpants in American – the English equivalent
  of American pants is trousers
• PARAFFIN is kerosene – American ‘paraffin’ is paraffin
  wax or white wax
• PASTRY CASE is a pie crust
• PASTY is an individual pie as in Cornish Pasty
• PAVEMENT is sidewalk
• PERAMBULATOR shortened usually to ‘pram’ is a baby-carriage
• PETROL is gasoline
• PILLAR BOX or POST BOX is a mail-box and its painted
  red not blue
• PLAIT is a braid when applied to girls’ hair
• PLASTER is a band-aid
• PLIMSOLLS are shoes such as American deckshoes
• PLONK (SLANG) is wine
• PORRIDGE is oatmeal
• POLYFILLA is spackle compound
• POPPERS are snaps
• PUDDINGS (the term) can be used to group all desserts whether
  it is cake, pie, ice-cream, custards. British puddings are not
  like our custard type "Jell-O" pudding
• PRANG (in a car) is a fender bender
• PREMIUM BOND is a Government Lottery Bond which has no
  interest
• PROVISION is accrual
• PUB is a public house which is a bar with an English atmosphere
  which cannot be defined in this small space – go an see one
• PUB WITH ROOMS – is similar to an inn
• PUSH-CHAIR is a child’s stroller
• PYLON is a high tension tower
• QUEUE as a verb it means to stand in line – and woe betide
  you if you cut in
• QUID (slang) is a one pound note
• RED INDIAN means an American Indian – ‘Indian’ alone means
  a native of India
• REDUNDANT is to be released from a job
• REEL is a spool
• REFUSE COLLECTOR is a garbage man
• REGISTER OFFICE is a marriage clerk’s office
• REMEMBRANCE DAY is November 11 or the nearest Sunday and
  is Veteran Day in America
• RESIDENT is the name for a person registered at a hotel
• RETURN TICKET is a round-trip ticket on a train or bus
• RING ROAD is a circular route around a town
• RING UP is to telephone
• ROAD WORKERS is road construction or road repair
• ROUNDABOUT is a traffic control or a merry-go-round
• RUBBISH is garbage
• RUCKSACK is a backpack
• RUNNER BEANS are string beans
• SACK is to be fired from a job
• SCONE is an American soda biscuit and its eaten with butter
  and often jam and cream
• SCOTCH EGG is a hard-boiled egg in sausage meat
• SELLOTAPE is scotchtape
• SEMI-DETACHED is a duplex or two-family house
• SEND DOWN means to expel from University although it may
  indicate only a temporary absence
• SERVIETTE is a napkin
• SHANDY is a drink made from beer and lemonade
• SHEPHERD’S PIE is a dish made from minced beef and potatoes
• SILENCER of a car is the muffler
• SISTER in a hospital is the head nurse of a ward
• SLAP-UP four-star, excellent-refers to food
• SLATE is to express a harsh criticism
• SLIPROAD onto a motorway is a ramp
• SOLICITOR is an attorney
• SPONGE BAG is a toilet kit
• SPONGE FINGER is a long, soft, sweet cake or ‘lady-finger’
• SPROUTS is Brussels sprouts
• SQUASH is a fruit drink
• STALL in a market is a ‘booth’ but in a theater is an orchestra
  seat
• STARTER is an appetizer
• STONE referring to weight is 14 pounds
• SUBWAY is a pedestrian underpass
• SUMMERTIME is when daylight saving time is in effect
• SUPER means ‘terrific’ i.e. splendid
• SURGICAL SPIRIT is rubbing alcohol
• SURGERY is a doctor’s office
• SUSPENDERS are garters
• SWEETS are candy
• SWISS ROLL is a jelly roll
• TA informal thank you
• TABLE the verb means to submit for discussion (the reverse
  of its American meaning)
• TAILBACK is a line of traffic
• TAKEAWAY is carryout
• TALLBOY is a highboy
• TAP is faucet
• TARMAC is pavement
• TATTY is shabby
• TEAT is a nipple for baby’s bottle
• TERM is one of the three educational parts of the year
  – roughly like a semester
• TERRACE HOUSES is a row of 3 or more usually 2 or 3 stories
  high
• THEATRE in a hospital is the operating room
• THIRD PARTY INSURANCE is liability insurance
• TIGHTS are pantyhose
• TIN as a food container is a can
• TOAD-IN-A-HOLE is a dish of sausage ‘bangers’ in batter
• TO PINCH is to steal
• TORCH flashlight
• TORY is a member of the Conservative party
• TRAINERS are sneakers
• TROUSERS are slacks
• TUBE in the subway
• TWEE is arty
• UNDERDONE referring to meat is rare
• VACUUM FLASK is a thermos bottle
• VAN is a small truck
• VAT is Value-Added Tax. Similar to sales tax in the states
• VERGE (OF ROAD) is the shoulder
• VEST is an undershirt in Britain not the American meaning
  of a ‘waistcoat’
• VILLAGE is a small town without a mayor and usually with
  under 3,000 people. In the UK can be a handful of houses with
  a church and a pub, or a larger settlement with shops and community
  center
• WASHING UP LIQUID is dishwashing liquid
• WASHING UP POWDER is laundry soap
• WC stands for "water closet", in other words,
  the toilet
• WELLINGTONS are rubber boots named after the Duke of Wellington
• WHISKY is Scotch
• WHISKEY is Irish
• WHITEHALL is a collective word referring to the government
  because so many government offices are located around the road
• WHITE SPIRIT is alcohol
• WINDSCREEN is a windshield
• WING of a car is the fender
• WIRELESS is the original term for radio and is often used
  by older people
• WOOLLY is a sweater
• WRITTEN OFF (CAR) is "totalled"
• ZEBRA CROSSING is a striped pedestrian crossing
• ZED is the letter ‘z’ (or "zee" as pronounced in American English)

Everyday that you call Cox High Speed Internet, you hear a message that was re-recorded that day saying “as of today [insert day] many customer in Arizona are currently experiencing difficulty getting to many large website, we are aware of the error and our technicians are blah blah blah”. I’m sure it’s in more than AZ that they are recording this message but don’t know how deep the rabbit hole goes.

Now I was pissed at them for a few days because they lied to me and said they hooked up my internet when they really didn’t… when they finally fixed it I was good to go to be able to see all the websites, while my neighbor who is screwed into the same exact cable splitter can’t get to most sites.

So I went and figured out why I am better than everybody else.

I use different DNS. Yep, though I start on their server I jump to different DNS servers than everybody gets when they connect to Cox. I have 2 very different alternates in fact. So all you need to do is hardset your Internet Connection’s DNS to what I use and your problems should be solved.

Primary DNS: 208.67.222.222 (this is from opendns.com you could also use 208.67.220.220)
Alternate DNS: 4.2.2.1 (this and 4.2.2.2 have worked FOREVER)

If you don’t know how to do this then you simply need to open the Network Connections Folder > Right Click on your Network Connection > choose Properties > Highlight (TCP/IP) and choose Properties > Click ‘Use the Following DNS Server Entries’ and enter the numbers.