Lying for a Good Cause

Saturday, June 2nd, 2007 | Life

Ok, so I told you all how my iPod Video got stolen… grr… Well anyways I have been going back to that car wash every single day and bothering the manager. I had no expectations to get my iPod back, but I was damn sure going to keep annoying the manager until he gave me the money to buy a new one.

Well on Thursday I decided I would pressure the manager into bothering all of his employees with some misinformation and if that didn’t work I would pressure the manager into bothering corporate to “pay me off” so I don’t put out a full page newspaper ad alerting people to how bad this carwash is.

So I told him to say:
1) That the owner of the iPod is going to report the serial # stolen and that when they connect it to itunes that it will alert them that it’s stolen and then will be traceable back to them, and if they tried to sell it to somebody and it came up stolen surely that person would also report the person who sold it to them.
2) Once it’s discovered who took it the INS will be involved and they will get deported.
3) Make everybody sign new employment agreement paying them less in order to pay for my iPod and other stolen goods.
4) Threaten to fire anybody who isn’t being honest.
5) Offer a reward or something for information on it, tell them it will be anonymous, and also offer the person who took it a drop box to put it in so that nobody sees them return it.

He agreed to hold a meeting and do all of this. That same night he held a meeting and I guess he even went so far as to defend the statement about immigration getting involved stating that the “laws have changed”.

The next morning at 8am he called me and I went in and picked up my iPod!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I mean I could of reported the iPod’s serial number stolen and it would of rendered not working once they tried to sign up for itunes, but even if it logged their ip address it would of taken a subpoena to both Apple and the customer’s ISP etc.. just to get that. Also the INS wouldn’t give a flying fuck about it. The manager would not have been able to dock their pay. Also the place he setup for them to return the iPod had a camera on it.

See, now whoever said lying never did any good was full of crap. This proves it.

               

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