This was just a definition of what I was to myself at that exact moment. I can not define you. I can label you and put you into boxes, to help me better understand who you are. But ultimately that will never give me a truly clear picture of who you are.

Today a friend of mine was very upset, they stated that we didn’t see them for who they were. This is of course true, since I can not see from their perspective. I have chosen to define everything in life differently than they do. My words are linked to associations and pictures that have nothing to do with what their associations show them. So how could I possibly see them for who they want me to see?

From my current perspective most things I see around me are defined by the separation. If you were to look at a map, you could point to the Atlantic Ocean. When you talk about it you refer to it as one thing. However the only thing that separates the Atlantic Ocean from the Pacific Ocean is perceived distance. You could choose to see it as one ocean, two oceans, or zillions of waves and particles. All of them are valid in this reality.

If I were to see from the slice of perspective that my friend has then everything they ever said and believed is true. His knowledge of life, his understanding of science and philosophy, simply everything.

Thing is, I cannot see from that perspective. Nobody but my friend can. Perhaps if I were to move into a higher dimension, where I could reflect on their experiences then I could understand it better. However unless I truly became my friend I would never fully understand him.

How I see it, there is no reason to be upset by what other people think and understand because they are not you.

Life is a repeating pattern of the same thing over and over, seen from a different point of view. That is part of what makes it so beautiful. Ask somebody today what the most beautiful thing they have ever seen is. Each person who takes the time to come up with an answer will have a totally unique story. A description of something that you would have never seen. Sure, you can understand some of what makes it beautiful to them, but had you seen the exact same thing as them at the exact moment you would have seen it totally different.

Everybody gets butt hurt sometimes. We take something personally that we shouldn’t. Perhaps it’s from a relative, a friend, or even a television commercial. We start to expect certain things. We EXPECT that somebody will respect us, or will validate us in our ideas. We expect a little common courtesy and some empathy. Then our expectations get broken. Since even if the other person thinks they are being respectful and courteous their idea of what that is will still be different than yours. Nobody will always give you exactly want you want all the time, no matter how much they love you.

So why let somebody define you? Why even define yourself? Each thing you define by limits you. It is true that there are many things that are convenient to have structure and labels, but as a human being you are beyond labels. You are beyond all things I can ever imagine. You are who you are, and you will always be. Yet day to day who you are will change. Each day you will have a little different view on even the same things.

This too is just a limited perspective. A piece of writing can never encompass how people will interpret the words. It is simply a place to start. A place to begin to create your own truth, and to start letting go of the labels you put on yourself. When you really understand who you are, nobody will ever be able to hurt you.

Unless of course you want them to….

The real issue with lack of blog posts comes from [insert excuse here]. Yes that’s right, because of [insert excuse here] I have not been willing to spend the time to write down new things that have happened in my life.

Also I am kind of drifting away from being the smart ass and I think I will end up making this blog into just a blog about updates on TSA.

But for now I will just try not to [restate original excuse here], though don’t hold your breath waiting to hear about all the stuff that’s happened this year.

“Welcome to the end.  Tonight, there is nothing to fear.  Everything around you is changing, nothing stays the same.  This version of myself is not permenant. Tomorrow I will be different.  The energy never dies.  Energy cannot be destroyed.  What we create.  It always is and it always will be.  This is the end and the beginning.  Forever, infinite.  Welcome.”

Below are the artists with new 2009 albums I’m listening to:
Alice in Chains
Anti-Flag
Avril Lavigne
Beardfish
Black Eyed Peas
Brand New
Chris Cornell
Cosmic Gate
Courtney Love
Depeche Mode
Diana Krall
Dolores O’Riordan
Eels
Eminem
Europe
Faith No More
Fastball
Filter
Free Spirit
Green Day
Hurt
Infected Mushroom
IQ
Jeff Buckly
KISS
KMFDM
Lily Allen
Mika
Miles Davis
Moby
Morrisey
Mr. Big
Muse
Neil Young
Our Lady Peace
Paramore
Placebo
Porcupine Tree
Prodigal Earth
Revolution Renissance
St. Vincent
Sufjan  Stevens
The Answer
The Decemberists
The Fray
The Mars Volta
The Prodigy
White Rabbits
Yeah Yeah Yeah’s

I haven’t listened to all of this stuff yet, but I have bolded the ones that I have and they are all pretty good.  Their perspectives on what to do about it are mixed, but I think they will all serve as muses for the rest of us and I highly recommend you find yourself some 2009 albums.

Now the day I went to get the car wash my registration was expired.  Seriously it shouldn’t have mattered as I was selling it and leaving the country and was never going to drive it again.  So I went and made a sales contract and got it notarized and everything.  Doing this proved the car was sold and the girl who bought it registered it the same day.

Well, I faxed in all this proof from overseas and asked for a dismissal.  They refused and gave me a continuance so that I could come to court right upon my return to the states. Court was mandated so if I didn’t go they would of suspended my license.  Mind you this seemed a little silly to me as I didn’t own the car, but I figured I just needed to show up to get them to dismiss the charges. 

So, I still don’t own a car.  Took a bike to the light rail in Phoenix to defend my “corporation” from fines. 

I stated my case and the officer didn’t argue with anything I said.  The judge then said, “blah blah blah, I understand you BUT, blah blah blah still expired”.  Then he told me it would be a $653 fine, due immediately and there would be interest and other fees added if I needed time to pay.

I almost shit my pants.  I could buy a car, get an emissions test, registration and minimum insurance coverage for that price if I tried hard enough!!!!!  I could register a different car every day of the week for half a month for less than $700.  It has never been more apparent to me how corrupt the system is than now. 

After court I sat in line to get a number, so that I could then be told to stand in a different line.  That line then put me in a different line where I was given a piece of paper so they could “assess what payments I could make” and then when I got done filling that out I had to stand in 2 other lines again, followed by one more where i picked a number and waited to pay my minimum of $20 required today. 

In the many lines I heard many people trying to explain to people behind a counter that they had taken the time out of their day to come down to the court to try to get an extension on a payment.  Then I would hear the people behind the counter telling them that they had a maximum of 4 days or else a warrant would be put out on them.  Beyond this terrible show of power there were other people yelling about extortion (which I fully agreed with) and all sorts of other ridiculousness caused by the system.

We need to stop putting up with this crap.  This is the world we are part of.  We need to make a stand.  I am not advocating fighting and war as that is part of the terrible system we are already integrated into.  I am instead trying to get each person out there with a bit of compassion to stop supporting these systems. 

We allow a government to rule us that we all know is corrupt.  We allow them to make laws that criminalize everybody except them.  You are raised to believe that everything is black and white or good and bad but nothing is that clear.  The justice system we have in place only serves itself as do the corporations and the government (which has actually stopped hiding it and has just outright admitted that they own the banks and the banks own them). 

I will very soon be launching a draft of a new idea to help change this rotten system into something beautiful, but I cannot be alone in my cause.  You do not need to wait for me to finish my plans, you can actively work towards your own goals.  The world is not unsavable, you simply need to know what you want and tell everybody else around you that they should go for what they want as well.  Stop banking at government controlled institutions.  Stop voting on leaders from the 2 party illusion.  Stop watching the news.  Stop discriminating against people, as you were taught to look for differences in others.  Instead look for similarities and find common ground.  We are all connected, and this world has to support us all. It’s a long broken system and we now have the technology to build a new one that take everybody into account.

Do not protest against corruption and evil, for there is virtually no end to it.  We are surrounded by fear and nasty things like what I have written above that will depress you.  This is not to say you should not see the corruption.  It is vitally important that you understand how rotten it is, for we put up with a lot of shit.  Wake up and break the cycle.  We all need to stop being enslaved by systems that do not benefit us. 

There is no democrat/republican/communist/christian/muslim/jewish/black/white/asian/terrorist plot out to get you.  We are taught to be separate, to feel alone.  To think just for ourselves.  Sure we all have our own beliefs, perspective and our own life purpose but there is no reason why we can’t all get along.  We all live on the same world and when we improve the world around us even if only a little bit, it improves drastically for all of us.  Life improves when we help each other and not when we screw each other.

Wake up! 

Tell your friends, tell your family, your co-workers, your online community.  Tell them that together we can all fix this.  We can make a world grow instead of die.  We can love each other instead of stabbing them in the back.  We can be the change that we want in the world.

To those who have never been here, and I have spoken to many people who don’t have any idea where Prague even is, it is one of the most beautiful places I in the world.  The buildings are very old, the architecture is amazing, the streets are all cobblestone, the transportation is so good that you don’t have any reason to own a vehicle and the people who live are generally happy and friendly.

I am rather sad to leave, but the only way to stay is to do so illegally.  Perhaps if I had a good stable job it would be one thing, but I have things to take care of back in America anyways.  For example, my first week back I need to go to court to defend an expired registration ticket on a vehicle I don’t own. :)

Ah yes, good times await.  I will get back to America in time to watch the dollar collapse and the Amero be introduced.  This truly is a historical period in linear time and I have realized that there is nothing to fear.  For when I get back I will be quickly publishing a draft of my ideas for a new distribution system and a new form of online democracy.  There are many more things on the horizon and though I have greatly enjoyed my time in Prague I now understand that I need to get to work.

So then I find out that somebody did send me something specific and I didn’t get it.  My spam filtering is totally off on that domain so that was really odd.  I figured it bounced.  Well I poked around my server and in my webmail I now have 52 new personal emails that have been collecting for over a month.   Some of which I REALLY needed to see when they came.  Doh.   So now I get to read through all of these and send lots of “my bad” responses to people.  Still not sure what outlook’s problem is.  However as soon as I figure it out I will post it on this post as a solution in case it happens to other people.  I mean email that’s not downloading is easy to fix if Outlook is giving you an error message, but when it’s not it’s rather tricky and I’m not about to change email clients just to fix it. 

UPDATE:  I got outlook to work correctly by deleting the account and re-adding it.  However before doing that I combed through all the settings and could not find any one of them wrong. 

Thought Process ~~~ Okay let me see I have some macaroni shells, 1 pita bread, 1 potato, 2 chilies, oatmeal, 2 eggs and half of a beer I am currently drinking. Hmm, no sauce but I do have some cinnamon, sugar, cayenne, black pepper, salt, weird olive oil (meant for BBQ) and wait, I do have nearly 1 teaspoon of spaghetti sauce if I scape the jar.

Screw it, I am cooking all of it together. ~~~

Sliced up the potato into thin strips, decided to make my own “chips”. Cooked it in the weird olive oil I have, but decided that was boring so I added a bunch of cinnamon and my chili’s to the frying pan.

Boiled the macaroni shells, not enough sauce for them so I just took my tiny bit of spaghetti sauce and threw it in another frying pan with my eggs. Also I decided that since potato’s had cinnamon that eggs needed sugar. Macaroni was done boiling so I dumped out the water and let them soak in the remainder of my beer for flavor (I was always told that all there is too cooking well is to add more flavors).

Heated up my pita bread and was going to fill up 2 halves of it with stuff, but I had more than could fit in it so I only filled one half of the pita and saved other half for later.

It was still kind of dry so I quickly made just a little bit of oatmeal, with more cinnamon and sugar and since this was going to be my sauce I decided that It needed a kick so I added some cayenne powder to it.

Now, I knew that I might have just wasted all of my remaining food on total shit, so I just smiled and nodded, mixed it all together and braved my first bite…

To my utter surprise, it was FANTASTIC. Who could have imagined that something this bizarre could taste so good!? Only thing it needed was some kind of meat, but ya make due ya know..

So I gave it a name: Beeraroni Egg Pita VS. The Spicy Sweet Oatmeal Chips

Sure, it sounds more like an exhibition grudge match staring your breakfast, but I assure you the meal was worth every penny I paid for it.

Yeah, I hate that too.

Anyways, it picked a reasonable time to be down.  Most visitors to site are in America and that would of made it go down between 11pm and 7am depending on where in America they were.  On a Sunday night that’s not so bad of a loss.

I am however glad that I have a cron job setup to “check the health” of my server though.  It was designed by my friend to help me survive getting slammed by traffic by kicking people off and restarting the web service so that new people could get to the site.  The bonus is that it determines server load by checking to see if it can load my site via the web.  So this morning I had 60 emails telling me that apache had restarted ever time that job had checked the site. 

I highly recommend a script like that to everybody who runs their own server.  Just cURL your own server with cron job and if unreachable restart apache. 

Anyways.  I have been adding lots of new features lately.  Most of them for my site moderators/admins, so it might not have been noticed by everybody else.  However site will soon be automated and have constant new stuff on it, as well as noticeable improvements in user experience and interaction with the site.

So everybody be sure to make an account on the site.  You login once and you will stay logged in for the next year so it shouldn’t be too much of a nuisance.  I am working to make Facebook, Google and Twitter accounts authenticate on my site as well.  Technically they already do, but I haven’t gotten them to “link together” with existing accounts, which I feel is important.  Still even though you don’t see it you can already connect to site with your Facebook and Google accounts.

I went downstairs to one of my friends place and tested the drive on his desktop computer.  The drive when turned on made lots of lovely noises, but just wouldn’t turn on so I am SOL.

What this means:  I have lost 900 GB of data that was available to me while in Prague.  I lost app installs, all my movies and my music.  Now I am not a stupid so my music is still on my desktop computer which my friend has been taking care of while I am out of the country.  The 400gb worth of movies, well they don’t matter.  They are mostly lost, but the internet keeps getting faster and I will just be able to stream whatever movies I want from my own site if I need a movie. 

Yet, this is still rather tragic as it was very nice to have a massive amount of music on shuffle while I worked.  I can go back to listening to last.fm, however in order to do that I need to launch a date cracking software, that launches an IP hiding program and makes me look like I am in America… before I use last.fm since they started charging per month to use their service overseas due to licensing issues.

Don’t worry about me replacing the expensive drive, as it is still under warranty, though I can’t send it back until I am back in America so I might as well not start the RMA now. 

So if anybody would like to pay their respects to my formerly amazing media storage device, there will be a moment of silence immediately proceeding your reading of this post.  I would set a time, but then we would all have to synchronize watches cell phones and I just don’t see that working.

This will still be a torrent tracker, but to use it you need to pay and that money will go to pay off the copyright holders.  Well I laughed at this, and thought of suprnova and how it once died for being the first real piracy tracker out there that everybody used.  The guy who created it got sued and harassed and threatened at his home.  Yet today it’s back up and running again as a good ol’ fuck you to the people who wanted to take him down.

How I see it: 

Avast ye maties, you come to this island you will pay me a fee and
then i will charge you for that which you are getting free on other
trackers. BUT, as a consolation you will get to feel less catholic
guilt and have to go to confession less for your vile sinning ways.

When will old people (media companies) learn, distributing content to as many people
as possible makes more profit for the people who made the content.
piracy increases distribution and interest in products. because people
pirate windows 7, they blog about it and other people find their blogs
and become more interested in it and then they pirate it at home and
decide to buy it for their business.

In 1999 the offspring was the most pirated band on the internet.  They also had the highest selling album.  Back then I made compilation cd’s and gave them freely to my friends, who then became fans of musicians they had never heard of and ended up going to their concerts at local festivals.

New media distribution won’t conform to old systems, learn to work the new systems in new ways to increase your profitability.  If you really want to work with the new type of media instead of fight against it then start making content that isn’t restricted by a bunch of DRM (digital rights management simply means that you buy content for one specific platform) and you give it to me on super fast servers faster and more convenient than I can pirate it then I will buy it.   I buy games on the playstation store because it’s convenient and I am lazy. 

Anyways, you can pirate the new RTM version of Windows 7 (build 7600) at btjunkie.org or isohunt.org, and help improve their sales to businesses and OEM manufacturers by creating more of a demand for it.  They really have worked out a lot of the bugs that plagued it for me on earlier versions and I think business and OEM’s should pay for it.