Rasputin Kicked My Ass

Friday, June 9th, 2006 | Helpful | 3 Comments

Well, maybe not really… but enough to warrent the title.

See tonight I went over to Rob’s for some salmon. He enjoys cooking when somebody else is buying the supplies for it. Well there was a lot of prep time for what he was cooking so I took the effort to use that time drinking some “prohibition speakeasy beer” that I had procured earlier in the evening while I was waiting. Actually I wasn’t a big fan of the beer having as Rob put it a Microbrew after taste, so when supper came I was happy to switch to white wine.

The meal was bloody fantastic sporting risotto cooked in chicken stock, broccoli spears and of course the seared salmon which was cooked in a thick red pepper sauce.

While eating it only seemed natural to finish off the bottle of wine. I mean who wants to try to cork it up again somehow…. Alas, the wine got empty and I was going to leave but made a comment that I needed to stop at the liquor store near him to pick up some quality beer since the ones near me have had lousy selection the last couple times. In making this comment it was taken that I wanted to drink more, and of course If I were to drink more I would need to share. So we went over to that liquor store and I bought a creamy stout and some Rasputin beer.

This is the type of beer that you can only rationalize buying after already having a good buzz going since for 4 bottles it cost $11, but of course it was called Rasputin so we knew it had to be good/evil (or at least powerful).

Originally when I had made the comment to stop there I had planned on going home and not drinking anymore, but now I was left with few, if any choices, being drawn in by the evil charisma that is Rasputin…

The beer was actually quite good and as expected, quite strong. I only had one of them but upon finishing it was informed that i needed to drink another beer, so I switched to the creamy stout to finish the night off. That went down quite fast and I decided it a good idea to go home then.

It was weird. After all that drinking, I did not have any real effects from it. I mean I don’t drive home if I feel off, I typically stay somewhere for an hour or two and drink water but I knew I could have easilly passed a road side sobriety test, though I knew there would be no reason for me to be issued one…

So I left. Upon nearing home though, I decided I had a craving for ice cream. Now before I moved here I had been obsessed with ice cream, but since being here I had only bought ice cream twice. Having pretty much kicked the obsession I could only attribute it to Rasputin’s evil grip on my subconcious thoughts. So I caved in and went to wallmart to indulge, where I decided it was best to purchase my ice cream in bar form for quicker/easier use. Yes, it was so quick and easy that I ate it in the car on the way home, and to my dismay have recently discovered that I shared this ice cream bar with my shirt.

When I got home I decided to watch some anime that I had downloaded and then went to bed. Of course, the only reason I am writing this is because I didn’t sleep all that well. I mean I got up at 5 am and started writing a blog post if you can believe that….

Still, I can’t deny the power of Rasputin, nor can I deny the power of his beer. I still have two of them left that I can save for some other night of sleepless debotchery.

Proof of WIP

Wednesday, June 7th, 2006 | Smartass | 1 Comment

Just thought I would give proof that I am actually improving old sections for the new smartass

Mythbusters Girl Goes FHM

Tuesday, June 6th, 2006 | GP | 20 Comments

Since I know that all smartasses (with televisions) watch mythbusters, and all guys who watch mythbusters think Kari Byron is hot. I figured it important to mention that she was just in FHM magazine. In fact it seemed relevant enough for me to post the pictures.

Kari Byron FHM 1

Want More? Of course you do…. :
Kari Byron FHM 2
Kari Byron FHM 3
Kari Byron FHM 4
Kari Byron FHM 5

Zombie Survival Guide

Tuesday, June 6th, 2006 | Life | 2 Comments

I couldn’t sleep tonight. Mind was on stupid shit that I am normally very good at ignoring. So I decided that having taken a short / uncomfortable nap today was enough to prevent me from sleeping well at night.

I have always had that problem. I sleep once during the day. Any more and it fucks up my ability to go to sleep again later. So being up, I decided to do the only thing that seemed rational at the time.

Read the Zombie Survival Guide (by Max Brooks).

You remember that dream I had once with the zombies at my old elementary school. Well I can still clearly remember it. I mean there must be a reason for me to have remembered it in the first place. It was probably meant as a warning.

I was quite facinated to learn that there are lots of myths surrounding zombies. One of the biggest myths is that zombies are created from corpses. Turns out through extensive lab research they have proven that zombies can only be created from hosts that still have enough blood to pump the virus (Solanum) to the brain. So this also rules out mummies from being labeled as the first zombies, since anybody with a basic knowledge of ancient Egypt would know that the first and most important step for prepairing a pharaoh for burial was the removal of the brain.

Yes. There was an amazing wealth of knowledge stored in this 273 page book, and I would recommend anybody out there like me who doesn’t trust our government to protect us, to read this book. I may even end up publishing it to this website, because important life saving information like this should be shared, to protect our world’s smartasses.

Strawberry Turd Nuggets

Monday, June 5th, 2006 | GP | 6 Comments

No, I didn’t come up with that name. Does it really sound like something I would say? No… But the man had a point, so no use in arguing.

WTF am I talking about you say? Thought that was obvious… Well, the other day Ken bought some Dried Strawberries. I have taken quite a liking to them and had to go buy more today.

Well, I am content to call them dried strawberries, but he was not. Seems that it isn’t what-so-ever a turn-off for him to eat them when he named them Turd Nuggets.

Basically this subject only comes up because I lack anything else interesting to talk about. I still don’t have a computer, and am not refusing to do any serious work on the new website design until I get my computer back together (someday… lets hope this week, but outlook is kind of shady looking), so the only other thing I could talk about is my either food or my roommate.

Food: I tried to get a legendary Fish Taco today, but failed. I got so far as to order them, pay for them AND wait for them, but was soon informed that they were out of fish and I would have to switch to Chicken. Damn it, now I still can not confirm the legend true or false.

Roommate: He goes against one of my pet peeves and that is that he can’t just sit and watch a movie. He has to be doing something else. Either talking to people online and ignoring all the wonderful visual content that makes a movie, a movie… or worse yet…. sleeping. I mean if you have never seen a bloody movie before, you should watch it, especially the stuff I recommend since it tends to force you to pay attention and think…

Other than that and a few other interesting personality quirks… I get along quite well with him since he frequently takes time out of his day to try to amuse me by dancing like a monkey and other such antics.

113 or is it 111

Sunday, June 4th, 2006 | Helpful | No Comments

So today it hit 113. Unless you ask my roommate and he will tell you 111.

Well see I have been very good about going out and running every other day, so I figured today was no exception. I waited until 8:30 when it was dark out and I went out.

DAMN skippy, that was a bitch / half. See it wasn’t the heat, it was the dryness. I mean it is always dry out, but tonight there was no mercy. I had only crossed the street before my mouth was bone dry and I knew there would soon be issues, so I did the only thing I could do without rationalization.

I started breathing through my nose. Well you can’t get as deep of breaths that way, and though today I was told “you are supposed to breath through your nose, and exhale through your mouth when running”. I still don’t believe it.

True, when you are NOT running, that is what you are supposed to do since your nose hairs work as a filtration system to prevent you from breathing in a lot of crap, but I do not have a Barbra Streisand like nose to where I can take in huge quanities of air.

So I only ran for 20 minutes, but I did it, and that’s all that bloody matters, right?

The New, Less Angry Plan

Friday, June 2nd, 2006 | Helpful | 1 Comment

So I decided I need to buy different stuff for my computer. For awhile I figured I would end up having 2 computers and need to sell one. Not having a big customer base down here I figured I would have to fork over a bunch more money to advertise it.

Well I came up with a better idea last night. I asked my roommate to check and see what kind of employee discounts he could get with intel. Well they had a couple high quality processors that were listed for half of the retail price that I can get them for at other sites. So I had him order me a high end dual core intel processor and I purchased a new motherboard, new ram, new cooling device etc..

Well that still gives me pretty much a new computer right? Well, today I sent the mobo, and ram off once again for an RMA. When they get sent back, it will be totally new ram and HOPEFULLY a totally new motherboard. However if it is, or is not, I do not trust it. I mean it is probably just the combination of that exact ram and that exact board that have issues, but I don’t know and am sick of trying to find out. So instead of assembling them into a computer, I will take the parts that work perfectly on their own and sell them all off over the net individually. They will all be new, in box parts except my cpu, which I can sell as OEM without a box.

Either way, this will solve all the problems. Except time. Yes, there will be a shipping delay on getting the processor from intel. However at $170 for a Pentium D 950 (look it up, it’s the 3rd fastest intel processor you can get, and it sells for over $350.. the fastest cost $1100 ($450 for intel discount, but I will not even try to buy that to sell it until i sell everything else)) I will end up coming out ahead, or at least even.

So yes, for another week or two I am still stuck on this damn laptop AND I don’t start my job yet, and all the tv shows I watch except Doctor Who and Bullshit & bleach are done for the season so I will need to work on the laptop, read, run etc…

It will be annoying, but when I get the parts next, it will be done. I will just sell off the old parts, and have new / different parts to work with.

1GB USB Flash Drive 4 $22.25

Friday, June 2nd, 2006 | Smartass | 4 Comments

Everybody needs at least one of these, and at that price, and coming from newegg (the most trustworthy computer sales site on the net…), buy 1. At least 1

FLASH 1G|KMX FLDRV KFD-001GU2 R - Retail

Later I will be posting a torrent to my own custom contents of my memory stick. It has portable apps that run off the stick without installing like firefox, thunderbird, emulators, and well… all my repair tools etc… So best to be ready with a nice new memory stick when I upload that.

UPDATE: I got mine in the mail yesterday. This thing is TINY. It comes with a little metal keyring that I put on my keychain. It’s not even a MM thick and less than an inch long. Seriously for this price, this tiny little thing kicks ass.

Disaronno On The Rocks (NOT Tanqueray)

Thursday, June 1st, 2006 | Life, Stolen | 4 Comments

So to make up for my bad day, I am doing the only thing that seemed logical (at least to a 25 year old man). I am drinking. I mean I wanted to go destroy something, but that would cause me all sorts of problems… I also wanted to go buy more shit, actually I don’t want to, but I think I might need to. Well, for now I am not getting anything.

So instead I drink. Not to complete and total loss. I decided that since I can’t turn on tv and watch mindless tv since we don’t have cable/satellite, and I can’t output from my computer because…. well I am not going to re-explain that, and I have watched all my DVD’s as well as my roommate’s, that now I would play with my roommate’s new toy.

I should be more specific. His new birthday present. Everybody say “Happy Birthday Ken“.

So far I had 2 ol’ fassions (one of which I turned blue to try to quickly go through my stages of grief), and 2 or 3 Disaronno. Since I am still obviously capable of making a semi-logical blog post, I think I probably have a couple more coming after this.

In the mean time, since I have been playing with Ken’s new birthday present (again, once you read this… thanks… I will tell you how to work it later). I decided to take a picture of things that can be seen from my chair…. Yes, that includes myself … So you can all stop asking. Oh and if somebody from my going away party could please send me a picture of myself then, I will post that as well since I imagine it’s VERY different looking.

Good times… (made artifically by the use of alcohol)

A NOT Good Day ALREADY~!

Thursday, June 1st, 2006 | Helpful | No Comments

Ok, so I am PISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSED OFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF now.

It seems that that one crash I had last night was just a pre-requisite for the big fuck you my computer was going to give me this morning. When I turned it on from power management and it crashed. I frusted reset it only to have it auto-reset again during boot. I was also now getting more posts from the mobo (nasty system beeps on startup), and it couldn’t get into windows. So I figured I should run memtest and see.

K@TJL#$K^J#$LK^%J@#$L%KJ

Ok my ram is dead again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That means either they sent me the same fucking motherboard, or my processor is dead, or both!

So I called them up, now on a first name basis with their tech support staff, and he told me that they had sent me the same board after lots of testing. Nice of them to fucking tell me that off the bat after I had already put ram into my first slot where I have decided the ram goes bad!#%@!#^%@#

YES, that’s right, they want me to send it back again. Only this time I said they needed to send me a new board. The guy checked out their inventory and said that they don’t have any of the board that I have and that they would have to try to fix it again.

At this point I am PISSED off and want to destroy something. I have no choice but to send it back to them, and NO, I can’t get a refund since I didn’t buy it from them, I got it from newegg and after all my frustration am far past the 30 day warranty.

See I CAN’T just not have a computer forever! If I send this back to them and they just send me the same fucking thing, then I will get it and have the same bloody problems all over again the next time around.

I can’t get my shit done anymore without my own system, so I need to go out and buy a new motherboard, new processor, etc….

Will let you know more when I figure it out. I will need to go get a job somewhere ASAP as well. Blah. What a pain in the ass.